The darker parts of thailand

Stale white concrete burns, humidity, fans creaking and grinds like the earth moving.. emptiness, nothingness. Motorbikes which purr like dragons breathing. Bikes whine their way through lonely road. Bars, red lights, tar and dirt. The air stings of sweet spice and sewage. Burning chilli, cracked plastic chairs, a sticky road, the stench of fish.

Lonely bars. Empty smiles that hide darkness, sadness and pain. Faces filled with longing and greed. Cracked red lipstick, words deprived of truth, guttural utterances, shining teeth, jet black hair. Eyes cold. Flashes of spite, envy and fear. The trickster ploys. The Cobra awaits.

Folds of blue and red dresses float seductively, convincingly and with purpose. Countless tattoos freshly scaring the sweet skin of youth. Sadness looms, green felt tarnished, ripped and brown. Heels shine laced with cheap diamonds. Mouths moving like broken records. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. The words repeat, the worlds infuse. Cheap love, whores of truth, lies and pain. Guarded hearts and open legs, lies, flies, odors, chains, pain. Sweet cows breath lined with honey whiskey. Ice melts, beer glistens and warms. The night ebbs away. The sun slowly rises.

The wandering heart

Her hair laps at her neck as it gently bounces in the breeze. She smiles the shine touches her eyes and she pulls back her hair from her face. Her hips move with the grace of nature and she sways majestically, mesmerizing me with her awe and tranquility. I wonder what will become of her. I watch closely as she stops at the place the beach meets the sand and she stares into the ocean. I am sitting here alone looking into the nothingness of the horizon. Her eyes are a clear brown mixed with specks of green and they glimmer with the reflection of the sun. Her skin is tanned and her dress is long. There is just the two of us and the only sounds are of the ocean waves sweetly kissing the shore and the seagulls shriek and moan. She stops and turns around. She faces me and looks down at me and my brown towel. 'Hello' she says in a quiet tone seductively sweet which almost purrs with femininity and vivaciousness. I smile and look deep into her eyes. I say nothing as I have nothing to say. I wonder what she wants and if she wants something I am sure that she will say more. She notices that I do not reply and in response she walks over and stands over me with a hint of curiosity and speaks again 'why are you here alone?' she asks. 'We enter this world alone, is it that unfitting that I experience this world in the same fashion?' I pause and look at her quietly 'I have come here to ponder on the essence of life and meditate on that'.

'Well what is so important that you wish to meditate upon?' she inquires.

'Death and love, as what else really matters?' I reply. She looks at me again this time with caution. Who the hell is this guy she must think? Some crazy lone bastard on the shore, looking at the horizon pretending to be a Buddhist monk.

I say quietly 'Love is being fearless to swim this ocean and having faith that you will make it to the other side. If you cannot surrender yourself to the vastness of the sea, then your soul will remain safe and calm although unsatisfied and lonely. The sea can destroy us yes, but without the courage to battle with the universe will will remain lonely and experience nothing'.

'She looks at me intently her beautiful eyes pierce into my very heart. In her eyes I read love pain and hope. There is not a trace of fear. She smiles again and begins to walk away from me following the shore line of the beach. But as she goes she says 'perhaps.' and pauses 'but for now I think I will keep on walking' and she does. She walks and becomes a speck into the distance and eventually fades into nothingness.  I smile and continue to meditate.