Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Welcome to Mexico City



Night and Day one in Mexico City,

It’s the 4th of August 2015 and I arrived in the hustle of Mexico City last night. It was 8pm, I jumped in a cab trying unsuccessfully to direct the driver in broken Spanish to my hotel. It was only after I showed him the address on my itinerary I was on the way to discover this chaotic new world. I won’t lie, peering through the glass of that taxi this world to me looked dark, ominous and quite frankly I felt way out of my depth. I had come alone, I knew no one and nothing and I didn’t even know if I could walk down the streets without getting robbed. However snapping back to the moment I realised that the cab driver had found my hotel ‘The Templar Mayor’ and I had arrived.

I walked in to the Templar Mayor noticing sharply some very shady characters that were lingering out the front of the hotel. I found my room, dropped my bag, showered and wondered how dangerous it would be walking alone on these streets. My goal was to go for a wander and try to scope out a place to down some local beers, try some local cuisine and start absorbing some culture not forgetting the two guys out the front.

My first meeting with Mexico City in that cab is that the place felt inherently dangerous. It looked dark, gloomy and smelt like dusty grime. However it was day 1 and after almost 20 hours of air travel I was not going to arrive in any city and not go and wander around and try and get a beer. So with a deep breath of faith, out into the wildness I went. I left the hotel, plugged on, turned into a few narrow streets. I was armed only with a map given to me by the lady at the front desk of the hotel. Truly in my style I had asked her where I could get a beer so she grabbed a highlighter, highlighted a few roads on the map and that was it. I tried asking a few more questions in English with no luck. I restored to my pathetic Spanish and I hit a greater wall of incomprehension. I have been here a day and it is obvious that hardly anyone speaks English at all. The few basic Spanish commands that I have under my belt are worth their weight in gold as at least I can ask what I want even if it’s a struggle and they can sometimes understand what I want or need.

So from this point on I won’t go into as much detail but I will nail it out in bullet point form. I hit the streets at 8pm and it was surprisingly safe – there were a few shady characters but I avoided eye contact and walked like I had purpose. I bought my first dose of street food that night which was some kind of mini taco for 8 pesos and it was quite delicious – imbedded in numerous flavours. I found the Centro town centre and found the The Metropolitan Cathedral of the Assumption of the Most Blessed Virgin Mary into Heaven – which according to Wikipedia is the largest cathedral in the Americas. I was blown away by the abundance of impressive architecture and history oozing out of this place. Long story short I found a great upstairs bar blaring with Mexican music, downed three beers with a meal and it was fantastic. I ordered unknowingly a spicy tomato soup with some kind of a taco meal with an avocado paste. Sitting there in that moment, leaving Australia and the corporate world behind it really hit me that I was in the heart of Mexico. I looked around soaking it up and I felt a sense of wonder at this which felt so culturally different although powerfully alluring. The Spanish conversations were ringing in my ears from tables from the couples dining romantically, the young hanging out with their friends it was a beautiful moment as I let it soak in me. I eventually wondered back to my hotel. I got somewhat lost. I asked some imposing police officers for directions and they pointed me to home, I was quite close and missed my mark by a street or two and so the pointing was enough to get me to that little hotel.

It is now that I reflect and get some of these thoughts down as I sit here in this cafĂ© in the presence over this massive cathedral which looms over me with dominance and asserts its own silent power. It stirs images of the Spanish conquistadors that once clashed with the Aztec empire, brutally conquering the land and people to claim it their own though steel, blood and disease. Apparently the stones used to construct the very pillars of the church were actually extracted from the Aztec pyramids that were destroyed to build the imposing church. I was somewhat grateful to experience that in my first night here as the city’s presence engulfed me fiercely and something stirred from deep within me. The culture, history and presence of this new land feels alive and resonates with energy. It is also rich with something that I cannot yet put my finger on, history, hurt, pride, looming poverty the hustle, I am not sure yet but it seeps into your core if your heart is open to feel it. Maybe later if I spend more time here I will understand it better but for now it is a wave of energy that sweeps over me that is hard to process.

I saw my first police with machine guns in a shopping centre – one actually had a worn pump up shotgun and the other a fully automatic Uzi like weapon hanging loosely from their carefree shoulders. The police here are everywhere and they have strong presence. They seemed be no more armed than the police back in Australia although one real difference that protruded from this is that they all are wearing heavy, think and black body armor. It makes me wonder what they need such high grade protection from. They also are driving these really cool American cars. I think they are Mustangs – I took a photo of one not realising that there was a police officer actually in the car and he got on the microphone and in unimpressed Spanish commanded me not to do that again. I definitely won’t be doing that again but I got a great photo.

My first day wandering around in Mexico and also see are car accident, actually I heard it first and then the smash of glass and metal on metal as a smaller Mercedes hatchback rearranges its front panel to something more creative. People came running from everywhere although what was most interesting that people all started whistling in a crazy fashion. That ramped up the chaos of the situation although at least the accident appeared minor and no one got hurt.

I am pleased to announce I bought my first authentic Mexican meal – the place very real with the menu all in Spanish. The young girl that served me struggled to understand my broken and stuttering Spanish. She had a nice smile as well that probably added to my awkwardness. I thought I ordered a salad and realised when the meal came out I had ordered quite the opposite. So I had steak for breakfast although not ideal it did taste pretty good. The positive was that at least I managed to order the coffee right. The place was one that I would like to revisit. It had ripped lino floor, a fan gently blowing, simple tables and chairs and white arches that looked somewhat archaic but majestic. The place felt like a snapshot in time and I could hear the man and wife who were obviously the owners discuss matters while the street people hurried by. There was also a small family eating gently near me, they were absorbed in themselves, eating peacefully with their children at this beautiful little restaurant. The place felt homely and it resonated with pure authentic Mexican energy.  

I walked into the cathedral and felt the still looming power of the Catholic Church imbedded in this culture. I walked into a mass with the priest delivering a sermon and giving Holy Communion to the locals. I got on my knees and soaked up that moment and it felt respectful.

Summing up this place is intense. I have been alone since I got here although I found one Mexican who could speak perfect English. Pepe was his name, he gave me a few invaluable tips on how to get a sim for my iPhone where to top it up from as well. He had an interesting story of working in the states for 15 years and they sent him back of a reason that I couldn’t understand.

Anyways signing off for now. The plan is to track down some backpackers that speak English. There are two local hostels which hopefully have bars. I will see if I can get in there and have a cheeky drink. Welcome to Mexico City. This place is vibrant and filled with untapped experience. I will try and write down some more of it if time permits to record it as I think it’s worth remembering. Peace and embrace.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

the loney shadow



The lonely shadow
My shadow weeps; it holds my lost and lonely heart 12
It binds, it tears it grips and stares 8
Never to depart. 5

What pain I feel that gropes and steals my very youth? 13
It strains me with a weary pull
It is my only truth

Darkness numbness I fight to claim the sanity of mind
It pulls me down it chokes my love
It renders my soul blind

The pain, the sorrow, the agony of life
I laugh in discontent
I fumble for a knife

My lonely shadow will not leave the essence of my pain
The world fades away gently
My blood pours down the drain

the loney shadow



The lonely shadow
My shadow weeps; it holds my lost and lonely heart 12
It binds, it tears it grips and stares 8
Never to depart. 5

What pain I feel that gropes and steals my very youth? 13
It strains me with a weary pull
It is my only truth

Darkness numbness I fight to claim the sanity of mind
It pulls me down it chokes my love
It renders my soul blind

The pain, the sorrow, the agony of life
I laugh in discontent
I fumble for a knife

My lonely shadow will not leave the essence of my pain
The world fades away gently
My blood pours down the drain

the loney shadow



The lonely shadow
My shadow weeps; it holds my lost and lonely heart 12
It binds, it tears it grips and stares 8
Never to depart. 5

What pain I feel that gropes and steals my very youth? 13
It strains me with a weary pull
It is my only truth

Darkness numbness I fight to claim the sanity of mind
It pulls me down it chokes my love
It renders my soul blind

The pain, the sorrow, the agony of life
I laugh in discontent
I fumble for a knife

My lonely shadow will not leave the essence of my pain
The world fades away gently
My blood pours down the drain

Monday, March 11, 2013

Thw Contemplative Man



A man and a woman spend a day in the sun. Eating, drinking laughing. They ponder about life family and love. He stares into the depths of her beautiful brown eyes and sees intelligence, creativity and compassion. She is a woman so full of pride and integrity. He looks closely at her and wonders. Where is the source of her courage and strength? Trials of life have torn her soul through tumultuous times, have made her sigh deep profound heaves and have brought so many tears to a face that is too beautiful to cry. Yet she is strong. She is brave and continues to fight with an innate passion that will never be destroyed. The man absorbs this quietly. He feels the warm breath of the wind, the rays of the sun entering his skin and contemplates. He feels a strong connection to this woman, he does not understand it yet he does not resist. This woman has somehow broken through barriers of forgotten love, past pains of rejection and fear, bitterness and anger. He does not feel these things. He only feels a sense of calm, quietness and connection with this woman and although she is so different she he feels she is somewhat the same. He looks at her and smiles. His heart is divided although he will gently resist thoughts of desire and he tilts his head to the left and listens more carefully to the words spoken by her. Her voice is like a melody her laugh is a sound so sweet he is enraptured by it. He is a slave to her laughter. He lives to makes this woman laugh. He wants to protect her, demand more of her and watch her succeed. She smiles her devilish smile. There is a sparkle in her eye. The meal is over. He pays. They leave quietly. The moments of connection slowly diminish, although they are not forgotten. She smiles gently at him. He is happy.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

The darker parts of thailand

Stale white concrete burns, humidity, fans creaking and grinds like the earth moving.. emptiness, nothingness. Motorbikes which purr like dragons breathing. Bikes whine their way through lonely road. Bars, red lights, tar and dirt. The air stings of sweet spice and sewage. Burning chilli, cracked plastic chairs, a sticky road, the stench of fish.

Lonely bars. Empty smiles that hide darkness, sadness and pain. Faces filled with longing and greed. Cracked red lipstick, words deprived of truth, guttural utterances, shining teeth, jet black hair. Eyes cold. Flashes of spite, envy and fear. The trickster ploys. The Cobra awaits.

Folds of blue and red dresses float seductively, convincingly and with purpose. Countless tattoos freshly scaring the sweet skin of youth. Sadness looms, green felt tarnished, ripped and brown. Heels shine laced with cheap diamonds. Mouths moving like broken records. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. The words repeat, the worlds infuse. Cheap love, whores of truth, lies and pain. Guarded hearts and open legs, lies, flies, odors, chains, pain. Sweet cows breath lined with honey whiskey. Ice melts, beer glistens and warms. The night ebbs away. The sun slowly rises.

The wandering heart

Her hair laps at her neck as it gently bounces in the breeze. She smiles the shine touches her eyes and she pulls back her hair from her face. Her hips move with the grace of nature and she sways majestically, mesmerizing me with her awe and tranquility. I wonder what will become of her. I watch closely as she stops at the place the beach meets the sand and she stares into the ocean. I am sitting here alone looking into the nothingness of the horizon. Her eyes are a clear brown mixed with specks of green and they glimmer with the reflection of the sun. Her skin is tanned and her dress is long. There is just the two of us and the only sounds are of the ocean waves sweetly kissing the shore and the seagulls shriek and moan. She stops and turns around. She faces me and looks down at me and my brown towel. 'Hello' she says in a quiet tone seductively sweet which almost purrs with femininity and vivaciousness. I smile and look deep into her eyes. I say nothing as I have nothing to say. I wonder what she wants and if she wants something I am sure that she will say more. She notices that I do not reply and in response she walks over and stands over me with a hint of curiosity and speaks again 'why are you here alone?' she asks. 'We enter this world alone, is it that unfitting that I experience this world in the same fashion?' I pause and look at her quietly 'I have come here to ponder on the essence of life and meditate on that'.

'Well what is so important that you wish to meditate upon?' she inquires.

'Death and love, as what else really matters?' I reply. She looks at me again this time with caution. Who the hell is this guy she must think? Some crazy lone bastard on the shore, looking at the horizon pretending to be a Buddhist monk.

I say quietly 'Love is being fearless to swim this ocean and having faith that you will make it to the other side. If you cannot surrender yourself to the vastness of the sea, then your soul will remain safe and calm although unsatisfied and lonely. The sea can destroy us yes, but without the courage to battle with the universe will will remain lonely and experience nothing'.

'She looks at me intently her beautiful eyes pierce into my very heart. In her eyes I read love pain and hope. There is not a trace of fear. She smiles again and begins to walk away from me following the shore line of the beach. But as she goes she says 'perhaps.' and pauses 'but for now I think I will keep on walking' and she does. She walks and becomes a speck into the distance and eventually fades into nothingness.  I smile and continue to meditate.